Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Happy Birthday Henry


We've anticipated this day with some anxiety, not knowing how to celebrate and remember Henry. My memories of him wax and wane, but lately they have been pronounced. The difficulty with loss is that you want to remember every detail, but every detail is a sharp reminder of what is gone. It is so difficult to separate the memories from the wishing.

I went for a long walk this morning and decided that today I'd be happy. Tara is off today, we're planning to visit Baltimore to donate some toys to the Child Life group that was so helpful to Henry. I'm sure there will be moments of sadness, memories that will be recalled for the place we're in. But I will continue to remind myself that we had wonderful times and that even if given the chance we wouldn't have chosen not to help Henry through that. It was our honor and our privilege to be his family and he will always be our son, brother, grandson, cousin and nephew.

Everyday when we awake we have a choice to be happy. I'm not always successful and many days I forget I have that choice or cannot convince myself that I can make that choice, but remembering him today, I'm grateful for what I do have - loving memories of him and today with my family.

So today we'll remember Henry and be happy.

Happy Birthday son. We love you.

18 comments:

granya and DeeDad said...

Bryan,

Your words are perfect - as tears stream down my face.

You are right - each day is a gift and we have to choice and talent and resources to make it the best it can be for ourselves and others.

Henry was wise beyond his years, mature beyond his age, and such a unique combination of that which he inherited and gleaned from his parents, siblings and family.

You and Tara can and should be so proud - he dealt with the "worst", the best way anyone could.

We love you and will always remember this special grandson.

Patty Rutter said...

We ar wearing our tee shirts Life is Fragile, Love is Not. Happy birthday Brian. Happy Birthday Henry. A girl in his class asked why we had matching shirts and what did they say- as tears welled in my eyes, I told her for Henry.
We are thinking of you often, and especially this day. Happy thoughts of Henry- comforting thoughts to your family. You are an inspiration to us all.

Shirley Moy said...

Very nicely written Bryan. Happiness is known to be contagious; even a little smile can make a big difference.

Happy Birthday Henry. We are thinking of you and your family on this special day.

Warmly,
Shirley/Alex's Lemonade Stand Foundation

Anonymous said...

Bryan, Tara, Anna and Sophie:

I can not begin to imagine how difficult today will be for you. Although the realization of your loss will be magnified I hope that you will be able to find some joy thinking of Henry, his antics, his laugh and all those little things that made him such a truly special little boy. He touched a LOT of hearts in his brief time here - he won't be forgotten.

In my thoughts

Dawn

rlbates said...

Hope you and your family have a "happy" day in Henry's honor. Take care.

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday Henry!

Love, Nancy in NC

Linda said...

We too are remembering Henry and your family today. What a wonderful way to honor Henry with sharing his toys.
Hugs to you all
Linda and Val

Anonymous said...

Tara, Bryan, Anna, and Sophie,

What a way to celebrate Henry's life with doing something nice for others. We can only imagine how difficult it is daily to make that choice to be happy, but what an inspiring perspective to have. We hope that you are surrounded with happy memories of Henry today.

Love, Julie, Brad, Patrick, Andrew and Samantha

Katie said...

Thinking of your family and Henry today. Peace to you all.

The Hebbs said...

"Happy Birthday, Henry!!"

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you all today as you pass this tough milestone. Hope that you enjoyed some nice memories as you brightened the days of others.

Bobbi

Michelle said...

Bryan and Tara,

Thought about you often today, and prayed for your family. LOVE your post about choosing to be happy... Henry wouldn't want it any other way.

Michelle in VT

Anonymous said...

To all the Schecks,
Thanx for coming into my life.
Happy bday Henry
nk

Anonymous said...

Sending your family lots of hugs. It sounds like you handled this tough day with grace.

Lots of love,
Wayne, Shirley, and Fiona Langford

The Coccia's said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HENRY!...
We think of you all often! You write with such strength and are always very inspiring!...I can't imagine what you are going through.......I was actually at Hopkins yesterday too, taking Chloe to Clinic for a check-up....I always get a rush of so many mixed emotions as I pull into the garage....Know that we love you and never stop thinking about you all!
Love,
Robyn and The Coccia Family

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday sweet Henry. I hope your family was able to find some joy in the day and that the visit to the hospital wasn't too painful for you. Thinking of you and praying for you,
Kara

Steph said...

Just wanted to leave you a message that Henry has been on my mind, especially the last week or so, as one of my children shares his birthday.

I miss Henry.

Loving you from afar.

Anonymous said...

Just checking in....hope you are all okay.
Kara